Sunday, February 13, 2011

Giving Myself a Boost of Faith

For about the past five years, I've tried various versions of starting my own business or doing some type of freelance work. Like, seven or more.

And each of them have either failed or fizzled out. Well, one of them was okay, but I came to realize it definitely wasn't for me.

These failures have haunted me. Haunted is a strong word, I suppose, so maybe that's not what I really mean to say. But they certainly bothered me. Why didn't they work out? Why did I fail? WHAT is wrong with me?

Over the past six months God has been bringing various pieces of the puzzle together for me, and then one day, Clinton from "What Not To Wear" suddenly brought the overall puzzle picture into clear view for me. (Yes, really.) He was giving advice to a woman who was constantly frustrated by not being able to find pants that fit her. She was quite depressed about it, and it was one reason why she had given up on any form of fashion for herself.

And Clinton told her, "YOU are not the problem. The CLOTHES are the problem."

For years she had only seen her body as imperfect and herself as a failure. The clothes were the standard, and she constantly didn't measure up.

But Clinton told her that she had a unique body, and designers make their clothes to fit the broadest spectrum of women possible. Which means that they don't make anything ready-to-wear for someone with her body type.

Then he and Stacy showed her how to make the clothes behave. They showed her the one or two places she had to make sure that pants fit, and then they showed her how a tailor could alter everything else. And suddenly, she had clothes that fit.

You could see the mental and emotional transformation taking place. By the end, she was having FUN shopping! She felt empowered because she now had knowledge of how to make the clothes fit her, not the other way around.

I've realized that in all of my business ventures, I've ignored something really important. I've ignored the things I'm NOT good at. Well, actually, I haven't ignored them - I've been apologizing for them; attempting to make up for them.

"I know I'm not good at X, but that's what my potential customers will want, so I need to make up for my deficiency in that area. I'll just try really, really hard. I'll be really disciplined, and it will all work out."

Only, it didn't.

I was trying to make myself fit the clothes.

As a result of various bits of revelation, I finally have a new perspective. I have a new confidence in myself, that the things I'm good at doing are GOOD ENOUGH. And that I can simply say no to the things I'm not good at. Why should I set myself up for failure? Why give anyone an expectation that will be a struggle for me to fulfill?

Now, I'm not saying that life will be perfect and I'll never have to do any work that I find difficult or tedious. But I have given myself permission to let go of unrealistic expectations for myself and focus mainly on my unique gifts and talents.

And you know what I've done? I started another venture. It's quite spontaneous and I'm just taking each day as it comes. But I'm excited about it.

What do I hope to do with it? First and foremost I want to help people build their passion through social media specifically, and through encouragement and ideas and creativity and innovation and strategy in general. I want to come alongside of them and give them a boost, help to give them a fresh perspective, and serve as someone who can help them do the things they can't do for themselves.

I would like for this to be a business, but most of all, I've come to the conclusion that I want this to be my ministry. Whether I get paid or not, I need to help people. This is my passion, and I'm finally giving myself a boost of faith to put it all out there.

I started to do a vlog about this but it just did not flow well. I was going to try the vlog again but then felt that I needed to type this out. I like having both options available to me!

In closing, here is my Facebook page. I'll be sharing general tips and advice on a building a social media presence, whether you are building a business, a non-profit, or a brand for yourself. Come "like" my page, and definitely email me at if there is any way I can help you!

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