Tuesday, January 13, 2009

God is good, all the time

So. I went for a second mammogram today.

I was told this was fairly normal. I knew that the first mammogram may pose some questions, because it is the baseline for the future. If I have cysts or dense tissue that have always been there, this is the first time the doctors are actually seeing them, and they need to do their best to determine if they are cause for concern.

And, considering my family history, I knew that I would be scrutinized more than most.

I was hoping to be told that everything looked ok after all, thanks for coming, see you next year, yada yada.


They wanted to take the next step and do an ultra-sound.

And then, the doctor came in to take a look. He showed me the specific spot that was causing concern, and said that he wants me to come back for a biopsy.

Not what I wanted to hear.


The next words out of his mouth were, "I really don't think this is anything to be concerned about, and if you were anyone else, I would say that we should keep an eye on this and be sure to check it at your next mammogram. But considering your family history, I would rather do a biopsy and be 100% sure."

Mike had come along to the appointment with me, and I hated having to go back into the waiting room and tell him that I had to schedule a biopsy. As we walked out of the hospital, I think we were both in shock. We talked briefly about it, but we had driven separately and it was freezing cold today so we didn't stand there and talk for long before jumping into our cars and heading home.

By the time we arrived home, we had made our respective phone calls to all of the important people in our lives, giving them an update. And we had both had a little time to process everything.

And, when the dust settled, the bottom line is that we are both at peace with this. Based on the doctor's comment, it seems that there are two outcomes. #1 - this is nothing. #2 - it is something, but it is at such an early stage that if I was any other woman, he wouldn't consider it serious enough to do a biopsy.

My appointment for the biopsy is set for this Thursday at 12:30 (eastern time). We will know the results next Monday or Tuesday.

In the meantime, I am resting in the peace that passes understanding. I am casting my cares onto Jesus. I am not worrying about tomorrow, because that won't do me any good.

How amazing is it that today, two bloggers I follow regularly had encouraging posts, reminding me that God is control. (Thank you Queen B and Sara.)

God is good, all the time. He is always faithful.

And, I haven't been able to get this song out of my head since church on Sunday. Isn't it amazing?


Willow Tree said...

Believing it's NOTHING for you! I'm glad the doc is being really thorough though, that is so important! Cling to the peace and post again soon, can't wait to rejoice with you.

Blessings, Carolynn

Smith Family Blog said...

Oh Erin, reading this brings back so many memories and makes me just want to cry. I had been checked every 6 months for over 2 years before they finally decided to biopsy-- and I had gotten so used to going, I hadn't even had K go wtih me that day. I remember the shock.

But you are SO RIGHT that God is so good! And when you get through this, you will look be able back and KNOW without a doubt that He is good!