The cow, part 2

If you missed the first part of the story, you can read it here.

When Mike arrived home from work after my crazy cow conversation with Kaitlyn it was one of those moments where I said, "Here - take your daughter," as soon as he walked in the door. I really thought my head was going to explode from her incessant talking and questioning about the cow.

We finally moved on to other things that night, but little did I know that it would all start again the next morning while on the way to the sitter's house. I'll spare you the details - just imagine a conversation similar to the one I recounted in my first post.

After we went for a few rides on the conversation merry-go-round I said an exasperated prayer. Was this a spiritual issue? Had an irrational fear taken root in her mind? Or, was this the product of an over-dramatic imagination at work? Lord, give me wisdom!

I decided that prayer is always a good thing and told Kaitlyn that we were going to pray about it. And pray we did. If there were any evil spiritual forces at work in her mind, we prayed them right on out of that minivan.

After the prayer she sat in silence for a minute or two, then said, "Mom? Can we pray for the cow?"

Pray for the cow? Oy.

This reminded me of the last time my mom watched Kaitlyn during the day. Kaitlyn suddenly starting talking about a monster and attached herself to my mom with a death grip. She was tense and fearful, and clung to my mom until finally falling asleep.

When she woke up, she told my mom that Jesus had come and kicked that monster out. Then she wanted the monster to come sit with her at the table while she ate lunch. Seriously? First you are deathly afraid of the monster, and then you make friends and want to share your pudding with him? **sigh**

There has been more talk of monsters since these two incidents. I'm thinking this is simply a phase, but then again there is that thought of what if there are times when she is really afraid and I'm acting like it's no big deal?

This is the part of parenting that I didn't realize would be so hard. The fine line between what is harmless and should be ignored, versus what is harmful and needs to be dealt with. What if I think it is harmless and blow it off but it turns out to be a serious concern? What if I think it is harmful and I make a big deal out of it, when really it was harmless until I started meddling and trying to fix it and then it turns into something harmful?

Talk about a merry-go-round.

I was thinking about this tonight and realized that it's only the start of the parenting merry-go-round of what ifs and guilt trips. She's not even three - I have many years ahead of the "is this harmless or harmful?" debate. In the midst of the barrage of thoughts and possible future scenarios that flooded my mind I realized that I, using my own skill and logic, will never be able to handle this thing called parenting.

The next revelation that came to me was the importance of building my relationship with God. This is the only way I'll stay sane - knowing that the One who loves Kaitlyn more than I'll ever understand is leading me and guiding me. Knowing that I can't go everywhere she goes, but He will. Knowing that He will give me discernment, and that His power is made perfect in my weakness. Oh what peace there is in that!

For now I will take the monster issue one day at a time. I've heard other parents of preschoolers talk about their kids being obsessed with monsters so I'm not going to freak out about it. (We have enough drama in our house without me throwing more into the mix.)

Nevertheless, you can be sure that we will avoid taking Kaitlyn to Chick-Fil-A for a while.